1. The key to surviving as a pedestrian on campus, among bikers and skaters, is to HOLD YOUR GROUND. When someone on wheels comes whizzing by, just hold your ground! Stop with the dodgy maneuvers-- they only confuse said wheeled-person, thus increasing your chances of them colliding into you. If you simply stay put and walk in a straight path, the wheeled-person WILL avoid you, they'll do the dodging! Life is easy! All you need to do is, well, nothing. Plus, this way, if they hit you, they'll be totally at fault and have to pay $$$ from lawsuits. Yay!
2. I find it really inconsiderate to listen to music or watch Netflix in public places, if you don't have headphones. Like sorry to offend you, but I would rather not spend my precious break time hearing your heavy metal playlists or the dialogue of your soap opera. The ONLY exceptions from this rule are if you are watching Seinfeld or Gilmore Girls, or listening to Jack Johnson, Grouplove, or The Rolling Stones. If one of those categories apply to you, then carry on. In fact, move closer, because I'll be damned if I'm going to miss some Gilmore Girls viewing time.
3. I envy wheeled-people. I really wish I had the talent to cruise through campus, balanced upon a board or a bike. For one thing it makes you look infinitely cooler, for another it gives you some nice muscles, and finally it cuts down your commute time significantly. But alas, I can only walk. I mean I know how to ride a bike, but I'm not sure I know how to ride a bike on campus-- there are different rules- it's a different activity all together. And I guess I could ride by Razor scooter, but I don't want to be THAT person. See the dilemma?
4. Mint Oreos are pretty good, but they're irrelevent in comparison to Peanut Butter Oreos. (DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN PURCHASE PB OREOS??? THEY ARE DISAPPEARING FROM STORES ON THE REG.)
5. I spend a considerable amount of time in the library. There are insanely comfortable arm chairs, the building is kept at a pleasant temperature, and duh, it's quiet. So, while I'm buried deep in one of the armchairs, which now that I think about it kind of look like Manta Rays, I often glance around me and notice the other library patrons. Recently, there have been dozens of tour groups parading through the building. I think they're comprised of prospective Freshman for next year, transfer students, and the parents of both categories. Anyways, they come in to the library, bustling with excitement at their future college experience. Bustling with high expectations for campus life. And then they see us: the library crowd. Like me, there are hundreds of other students, passively, anti-socially, and maybe even cynically curled up with laptops, Diet Coke, and Flaming Hot Cheetohs. The development of theories, frazzled research, and diligent homework that these tour groups imagine to witness when entering the library, is replaced by Netflix binge watching and online shopping. What a charming generation of collegiate students! Sorry 'bout that!
Yeah I'm aware this post lacked continuity and theme, but apparently that's a general trend of my brain ever since college began.
Yipes.
